Kindness in a vicious voting cycle

Kindness in a vicious voting cycle

Kindness in a vicious voting cycle Kindness seems a casualty in the vicious comments and rhetoric that surrounds us right now. Whether it’s social media in your own feed, or the pseudo-news channels, we are inundated. I posted some thoughts to my Facebook page earlier this week about the campaign. I had a great discussion going on between my readers, until a personal attack appeared amongst the postings. Yikes! I quickly reminded posters that discussion is great, attacks not so great. Everyone got back on track, and the attacker disappeared. I am currently reading for the second time, The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a compassionate Life, by Piero Ferrucci. I’m growing weary of the unkindness I see and hear everyday regarding politics. This book has me thinking about the effects of being kind.  How do we stay kind in this craziness? Why Kindness Matters While we may, or may not, see kindness in our up close and personal worlds, finding demonstrations on the news or in many television shows, is just not happening. Vicious attacks, mean-spirited comments, and rudeness are demonstrated in a daily dose. Unfortunately that bleeds into our lives. Remember the pay it forward commercials of some insurance company? When we see or hear kindness, we are more likely to engage in a kind act ourselves. Kindness begets kindness. This is an unexpected side benefit, and one to especially keep in mind right now. “[Kindness is] the most economic attitude there is…it saves us energy we might otherwise waste in suspicion, worry, resentment, manipulation, or unnecessary defense. It is an attitude that, by eliminating the inessential, brings us...
Meaning and how to find it in your life

Meaning and how to find it in your life

How to find meaning in your life Ever wonder what the meaning of life is all about? How do we find meaning in our lives when we work, in say, a factory doing the same thing over and over? Or running a cash register at a retail business? Or teaching children who are totally disengaged? Basically, you could add any job to this list. How do we find meaning in any of them? Maybe we’re applying meaning to the wrong thing When the Jews were all herded into prison/death camps during World War II, they were stripped of everything. All their possessions were taken away, they no longer had a name, but a number. Their clothes were gone and they were given ill-fitting uniforms, or the castoffs of the dead, mismatched and tattered. Whatever their profession had been didn’t matter any more. They were nothing but chattel in the eyes of their captors. In Viktor Frankl’s, Man’s Search for Meaning, he says they lost what they thought had meaning and soon found that meaning actually came from love, humor, kindness, and being human. Granted, not all prisoner’s grasped this, but those who did, and were not gassed or killed otherwise, they were the ones who fought to live, to keep going no matter how horrific the conditions. By the way, his book is really good. Finding meaning as we age For many years in my life, I defined myself by my jobs in education and I sometimes slide back into that if I think someone doesn’t take me seriously as a writer and health coach. I’ll slip in that I was an educator and...
Why we all need sistering in our lives

Why we all need sistering in our lives

Why we all need sistering What is sistering: I learned the term sistering yesterday: the reinforcement of a structural member by nailing or attaching a stronger piece to a weaker piece. (from the Dictionary of Construction) Now before you think I’ve gone into construction, let me explain. Glennon Doyle Melton‘s new book, Love Warrior, was released yesterday and Marie Forleo interviewed her on MarieTV. (If you don’t know about these two ladies, you should so be sure and click on them.) Glennon used this term to explain how much we need our sisters, whether biological or not. And guys, if you’re reading, you need your brothers in the same way. I’ve been blessed with two amazing sisters. We are so different, but we love each other and look out for one another. I’ve also been blessed with some amazing sister friends over my lifetime. When do we need sistering: We’ve all had tough times in our life. Going it alone makes the difficulties hard to bear. However, when we reach out for support from those closest to us, the burden is shared, making us stronger. My sisters were there for me when I went through a divorce sixteen years ago. I couldn’t talk to my parents about what I was facing, but my sisters were there and helped me through. I also had some friend sisters that helped pull me out of the deepest darkest moments, to get me back on my feet. You often find out who your true friends are when you face a crisis because only they will have your back. Why is sistering important: As a certified health coach, I...
Big Magic Review

Big Magic Review

I promised a Big Magic Review so to not disappoint…I greatly enjoyed Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, by Elizabeth Gilbert. Big Magic is just that, magic! Liz has created an inspiring, interesting, thought provoking read. (I think she would be okay with me being personal and calling her Liz since we are best friends, though she possibly doesn’t know that…but doesn’t she evoke that feeling in a lot of us?) I especially like this book for us RAgers, because I don’t know about you, but I’m certainly feeling the speed of time these days and encouragement to live my creative life to it’s fullest is just what the doctor SHOULD order! The book is divided into seven parts. Courage, Enchantment, Permission, Persistence, Trust, Divinity and there are gems within each section for sure. In Courage, she explains why we need fear (got to keep ourselves safe) but that some fear is just what we do to ourselves, and so we have to get past it because “…life is short and rare and amazing and miraculous, and you want to do really interesting things and make really interesting things while you’re still here.” Yes I do! I also found the idea of working no matter if you fail or not, to be enlightening just because so many of us, including moi, are scared of failure. I’ve read some reviews that found the Enchantment section too “woo woo” for them, but hey, find the fun in life, don’t take things so seriously. Believe that maybe ideas are floating around out there and looking for some place to land, and maybe that idea will land with you!...
A bit of “Big Magic”

A bit of “Big Magic”

I have a bit of “Big Magic” to share with you today. I am in Salem, OR this week and my favorite place to visit when I am out here is the coast at Cape Kiwanda in Pacific City: a big long stretch of beach;     a beautiful view of Chief Kiawanda Rock, one of three “haystack rocks” along the coast; and my favorite brew, MacPelican Ale, at the Pelican. A great trifecta! So what made the day magic? There was no wind, the sun was shining, and the temperature was in the low 70’s. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect day. I arrived around 9:30 and immediately took off for a long walk on the beach. This beach is the only place I’ve ever found sand dollars and many years ago, I happened to find two that were intact, so I hoped to find one again. As I walked, I kept my eyes peeled for a dollar, but all I found were pieces. Lots and lots of pieces. I walked for a couple of miles and decided it was time to turn back. The tide was receding some, so I walked further out and still kept an eye out for a dollar, but no luck. Then I decided to sing to the ocean. I mean, what the heck, no one can hear you above the waves, and I love to sing when no one is listening, so I started singing just random songs, then I composed one for the ocean, sung to the tune of Mr. Sandman, and it went something like this: Oh missus...
When I’m taking my last breath…

When I’m taking my last breath…

“When I’m taking my last breath, I want to look at how I used up the best of myself. How much did I sweat, push, pull, rip, fall, hit, crash, explode?… My dream is to be so well used that in my last half-second, I just burst into dust.” – Elizabeth Streb, choreographer RAgers, this quote really made me think about what I want to convey with the idea of Radical Aging. I believe we are meant to use all we have, to give our best, create, relate, love, strive, achieve, relax, play, have fun and all the things Elizabeth said above! Every minute, we have the choice whether or not we want to live that minute or let it pass through our life unused and unclaimed. It’s so easy to just let time slip through our fingers, wasted. I’m starting to feel that life IS short and maybe there’s not enough time to do all I still want to do before I burst into dust. I have to focus and plan each day to keep it from slipping away from me and some days I do this better than others. Some days, I think, how could I have wasted so much time? How could I have not made the most of the day? Then I go to sleep and the next morning, I try again to get it right. How about you? I have discovered, there is one thing that helps me stay focused more than anything else and that’s taking the time to write in my journal. If you’ve never tried journal writing, well, why not? Writing...